ISIS Retaliates to Pork-Tipped Bullets

The fast-selling ammunition for American soldiers, pork-tipped bullets, designed to degrade and demoralize not just the 30-50 thousand Muslims associated with ISIS but a third of the world’s population as well, has been answered by the notorious terrorist organization.

Islamic scientists from Syria have released a new gluten-tipped bullet as a means of combating the West’s alleged imperialism. The wheat-protein’s addition to the militia’s weaponry has given rise to grave concerns among the top military brass. “I don’t have Celiac’s disease, but I definitely have gluten-sensitivity. These bullets could really upset my digestion,” Gen. Craig Danielson was quoted as saying.

Questions are now arising as to whether this would fall under the Gevena Convention’s ban on chemical warfare.

More as the story develops.