Archives for category: Fun

People generally believe that to kill a zombie is a perfectly reasonable action and even a moral imperative. The undead are a scourge that must be wiped off the earth. But has anyone sat down and wondered if the undead deserve a shot at unlife?

Many, if not all, religions believe in some form of afterlife. Be it one or many, physical rebirth or spiritual, most religions agree that there is more to life than this empirical realm.

In Christianity, the body is physically ressurected, which means that the body that you currently reside in will be the body that you inhabit in the afterlife. There is debate as to whether you will be at your prime, or at the age when you die, but the Bible is specific that it is your physical form that is ressurected. Is it possible that the physical ressurection prophesized in the Bible is none other than zombification? Zombies are considered one of the conceivable ends of the world, and the return of Christ is also the herald of the apocalypse. Could these two scenarios be one and the same? And if so, would depriving someone of their divine reward be considered ethical? I would argue that it is not. It is never understood the mindset of a zombie, but perhaps rending flesh from bone and devouring the innards of another human being creates divine ecstacy in these undead children of God. Who are we to deny God’s gift?

In Buddhism, there is are several stages of rebirth. Being born a human is the greatest, as it is only as a human that we are able to achieve Nirvana. Another stage is to be reborn as a Hungry Ghost. This is a creature that has a constant need to feed, and will never be satiated. Is it possible that Zombies are in fact the Hungry Ghosts incarnate? Creatures who are cursed to burn off their Karma as these demons. It is considered immoral to kill Beasts, another stage of rebirth, so would not killing a Hungry Ghost count as immoral as well?

The Jains are another Indian religion that believes in rebirth as well as Karma. Jainism celebrates almost excessive forms of non-harm; some of them going so far as to sweep the ground in front of them to avoid stepping on any bugs. We hear of extremist religious fanatics causing death and destruction, whereas an extremist Jain will, near the end of his life, retreat into the forest and wait to die, so as to avoid harming even the plants that he or she would need to continue living. As bizarre as this might seem to a Western audience, it could easily be argued that this is the most objectively moral lifestyle that a person could endeavour towards. In the context of a zombie apocalypse, I would argue that the equivalent of seclusion until death would be to willingly embrace being devoured alive by zombies.

So as we can see, religious belief in ressurection is possibly linked to a zombie uprising. All religions have their own unique views on the subject, but the one thing in common is the ressurection of the person in one form or another. Being that this is the case, it is quite possible that a zombie apocalypse is one unifying eschatology that even secular humanists can get behind. Considering the religious nature of ressurection however, and how it seems to be the ultimate form of humanity, I would say that it is immoral to kill a zombie, and were a zombie outbreak to occur, the only moral course of action would be to embrace it.

One might not initially make the connection between rock and roll and borderline sociopathic existentialist philosophers, but upon further reflection one might begin to see more and more this outlook being expressed through song.  In this instance, the song Free Bird by Lynyrd Skynyrd.

The beginning of the song, where the singer states that he must be traveling on now as there are too many places that he’s got to see, shows the higher man’s dedication to his unifying project, in this case traveling.  The singer even sees those around him instrumentally to his project, such as the girl with whom the singer chooses not to stay.

The band’s song states positively that they cannot change, even with the help of the Lord.  This acceptance and embracing of being bound in their fated prison gives them an overman perspective, allowing them to truly be free. This paradox of the free bird being bound by the inability to change personifies Nietzsche’s paradox of the overman being bound to his strong personality, but being free to be who he is without restraint.

The symbolism of the bird gives rise to the notion that instead of being a part of the land-bound herd, the singer is flying high above, having ascended into the overman state. Being this “Free Bird” allows the singer to escape nihilism through sick guitar solos that melt your face off.

In conclusion, I’m doing this instead of writing the actual existentialist paper that I’m supposed to be working on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=np0solnL1XY

It might seem odd to think about, the hippiest of activities, gardening, is really a metaphor for the viciousness of capitalism, but it’s true. Allow me to explain.

Gardening involves weeding. Weeding is taking out the smaller, less profitable plants so that the more productive or fashionable plants are allowed to grow bigger. These plants are already much larger than the weeds, but the big business of gardening does not let any stand in their way. The Mom and Pop stores of the floral world are not even given a chance to survive because they get in the way of the progress of high-producing flowers or vegetables. It would be the same thing as the government tearing out the surrounding stores outside a Wal-Mart, and killing everyone inside so they can’t set up shop again. Gardeners are the hand of God, coming out from the sky and smiting the meek.

It doesn’t even allow the Free Market of the vegetable garden to decree which plants lives and which plants die. Gardeners are even beyond the libertarians. Gardeners are a fascist regime commiting a weed holocaust.

With no revolution in the foreseeable future, the bourgeoisie will continue to trample the rights and liberties of the proletariat plants who just want to live out their peaceful plant lives.